some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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