But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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