Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
