I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
