yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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