Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
