Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
