And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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