we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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