I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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