We won't sleep together?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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