Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize