I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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