i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
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