She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
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