it hurts more in the daytime
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
