He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Randomize
