fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
