Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
