Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
