okay pat passed out under dana's car
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
