Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize