don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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