Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Sponge bath it is.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
