We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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