My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
