Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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