Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize