Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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