I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Oh god it's open bar.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
