The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.