Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
