I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize