Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize