This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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