Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
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