How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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