I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
