I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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