Christians are straight up FREAKS
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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