Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize