Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
