I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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