? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Randomize
