im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Randomize
