I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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