sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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