you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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