You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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