she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize